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Yesterday was a trying day.  It was one of those days when it seems like everything that could drain my energy, did.  So like most people I took a look back to see what it was that seemed so draining and it was no surprise to me.  My day started off amazing but one incident was all it took to remind me what the world is really like.

Most of you that know me personally know that my work as a Chaplain is not the only thing that I do.  For those of you who I haven’t had the pleasure of meeting in person yet, I do a lot more than my work at Hendricks Chapel.  I have a wonderful husband whom I should say takes care of me, we have a small 56 acres to care for and I own my own business – a small metaphysical shop in Oswego, NY.  Beyond that I write, study and teach all the time.  My time is stretched, but in a good way and I wouldn’t really change any of it.  I enjoy my life without regrets and with a multitude of smiles! But yesterday was a reminder of the work that is left in front of me, in front of all of us.  Yesterday the world walked through the door of my shop in the form of an old woman with a question.

184312_719247819725_28406679_36325422_539982_nI had watched her standing outside of my front window looking at the statue of “the lady” in the window.  Finally she came in from the cold and approached me at the counter.  Her question was “who is that in the window?”  I knew the look, the tone, the accusation and I answered her “that is the moon goddess.”  “Who” she asked and I repeated that it was the moon goddess.  She told me that at first she thought it was a statue of the Virgin Mary but had looked and saw that her lap was empty, there was no Jesus, and she was confused.  After all, this is the beginning of the celebration of Christmas which is the celebration of the birth of Jesus.  Her face was harsh and so were her words.  She continued on that people have forgotten that the real reason for this time of year is to celebrate the birth of our lord and savior Jesus and they don’t go to church to say thank you.  She explained she had disowned her daughter for not going to church anymore and thought it a right punishment.  And then she asked the big question: “Is that a mockery of the Virgin Mary?”  I told her no, it wasn’t, it is the Moon Goddess and not a mockery at all.  She looked back at the window, the Goddess who holds in her hands the offerings of many, and then stated I needed to take it out of the window.  People would be offended by mocking the Virgin after all, especially this time of year.  Besides she said, we all have to answer to god including her but stated she had all the right answers.

Yes, I had forgotten, or at least had not been reminded in a while, what the world is like and apparently I needed a reminder in the form of an old woman.

As she walked out of the shop she turned and looked at me and the Reiki Master standing with me and told us to have a Merry Christmas.  I wished her warmth for the night and blessings of the season and then she was gone.  With her, hate and ignorance left as well but in her wake she left anger and painful reminders that while a great deal has changed nothing has changed.

The anger dissipated quickly but the reminder has remained.  But it is different from before.  The reminder is that a lot of work yet to be done is waiting.  It was a reminder that I cannot change the world, but I can control how I respond to hate when it walks up to me.  But mainly it was a reminder of the need to create more space where ignorance can be challenged and understanding can be fostered so that acceptance can be achieved.

So to the little old woman who walked in to my shop – may the blessings of the Goddess be with you that she might teach you the compassion you so desperately need in your life.  To the old woman’s daughter and everyone else – may the blessing of patience be yours.  The earth moves slowly but change does happen in time including the changing of minds.

Every now and then a moment comes along and it hits you – this is what it is all about.  Last week when the final stone was laid it was one of those moments.

Last Monday was the day that all the work on the stones was finished.  I hadn’t planned on being outside when the stones were actually laid into the ground but a friend needed a little fresh air so outside we went.  The day was cool, cloudy and threatening rain; for me it was a perfect day.  As we walked outside I pointed out the holes for the stones to our right, but in front of us we noticed a purple and white banner on the quad.   Neither of us quite knew what it was for but it seemed interesting.

We continued our conversation as we began to watch what was unfolding – it was a ceremony by the Native Americans Students at Syracuse (NASAS). As they began their celebration of song and dance I heard noise coming from the area where the stones where.  The stones were going into the ground at that moment.  I struck me then.  I was standing at a point of convergence.  I was in front of the Chapel, a place most associated with Abrahamic religions and at the same time witnessing traditional Native American ceremony through song and dance while a stone circle was being laid for Pagan gatherings.  Hendricks truly is a place of interfaith dynamics; a home for all faiths and a place for all people.

Not one of these things took precedent over the other.  The Chapel, the stones and the dance all had equal value and all were living in harmony with one another in the same virtual space. Isn’t this what true respect and diversity is supposed to be?  I believe so.

A few days later I was asked a question that I had never been asked before: “When people bring their religions and traditions to a new land how do they reconcile and respect the spirits of the land who are already there?”  I thought about it for only a second reflecting on the events of the previous Monday and my response was easy.  You ask permission.  When I began the process of requesting the stones seven years ago I did two things.  The first was in the original proposal I simply stated that the University has a unique and solid connection to Scotland and while all cultures in one way or another have some sort of connection to stones and megaliths Scotland’s connection is special.  Scotland has more standing stones and stone circles than any other country in the world.  How better to honor the University’s connection to Scotland than through stones. The second thing I did was I began to ask permission of the land here in Syracuse to allow this to happen.

When the holes for the stones were being dug a contingent from Lockerbie Scotland was on campus for Remembrance Week.  A coincidence that had nothing to do with the stones being brought to campus.  When the stones were being laid the Mohawk group Kanienkehaka Ratirennenhawi danced their song on the quad only yards away.  I believe both events blessings underscoring that all connections and energies were in complete agreement – it is time we lay aside differences and see what can bring us together to make us better in this world.

Today is a day for dreams.  Today is the day a dream of mine became reality and it is the day that new dreams are to be born.  Today is the day that a circle of stones, dedicated to the religious gathering of Pagans, was created at Syracuse University.

Seven years ago I wasn’t the Pagan Chaplain at the University.  There was no Pagan Chaplain, but I was the religious advisor for the student Pagans on campus and at that time I had a vision where the students would have a place of their own.  It didn’t have to be exclusive, in fact I didn’t think it should be.  Rather it needed to be a stone circle where they could observe ritual, meet with friends or do whatever.  This needed to be a place where they could feel the energy of their gods and their beliefs – a place where they would be reminded that they did matter.

Seven years ago I requested a stone circle to be built on campus.  For seven years I would periodically bring the subject up to those that needed to be reminded that Pagans did not have a place of their own like other faiths.  For seven years energy was built to push a dream forward and for seven years the ancestors watched and waited.  After seven years the energy culminated and the ancestors were heard.  I was asked to resubmit the proposal and all agreed that a circle would be built.

What changed in that seven years?  My position changed from advisor to Chaplain and with that a voice formerly foreign at the religious table was now heard. A new Dean at the Chapel was introduced.  The previous Dean had welcomed Pagans to the Chapel but it was the current Dean that understood the need for place. What changed was Pagans became recognized as valuable members of the religious makeup of the University deserving the same respect as any other faith tradition.

Yes, today is a day of dreams.  The stone circle doesn’t look like the stone circles created so long ago.  There are no standing stones familiar to so many.  There are only four stones – a stone at each cardinal point creating a 20’ inner circle.  The stones are large and made of blue stone, imbedded in the ground laying flush with the earth.  They needed to be unobtrusive, reflective of landscape and useable.  They are altar stones and any tradition, Pagan or otherwise, will be able to use them.  The dream came to life today when four stones were laid.

However, the laying of these stones is not the end of the dreams.  It’s the beginning of dreams.  A place for the seeds of possibility to break through and find sunlight to help them grow.  For many the creation of this circle seemed like a natural process and in many ways it was. When the voice of the ancestors sang once again those ready to hear their story listened and all barriers became non-existent. This was the right thing to do, this was the right day to do it and on this Samhain the ancestors will be honored in their stone circle.

Today I am overwhelmed. I’m overwhelmed with both the awe that I feel when I realize what has happened but also at the thought of what will be the next dream to come to life.

A day of possibilities is here.  It’s the first day of the academic year and students are attending the first classes of the semester.  Tonight is also the first meeting of the Pagan students for the year as well.  I look forward to this time because it is a time full of wonder, excitement and the knowledge that anything is possible. It is the last that I love more than anything.

So what do I have in mind for this year?  I’m not sure about the definitive but I do know the possibilities:

  1. Finish my bulletin board (it may not seem like a lot but trust me it is)!
  2. Participate in at least two interfaith events on campus.  This will be fun and I’m already working on it.
  3. Figure out fundraising – This one is actually very important.  Every other religious organization or church has on going funding from their larger denomination or sponsoring church.  I would like to see that happen here in order to better serve the students.
  4. Finish a few writing projects.  Some are about the Chaplaincy and some are not.
  5. Write my blog more!  This is actually the number two priority – write here at least once a week.  The number one priority is actually:
  6. Teach what I can to the students and find others qualified to teach them what I cannot.  I only know what I know and that is all.  There is so much in this to offer and give to the students that I am continuously looking for new and different people to introduce them to and in the process new and differing views on faith, belief and themselves.

So let’s take this journey of possibility together.  Keep me on track where you can and in the end we will end up in a much better place than we started because we worked together.

And if you want to help out with getting the fundraising part started right away you can always go to our Contribute page.

Yesterday was a day of disbelief – it will remain that for quite some time.

As I read the headline for the first time I didn’t understand it. I had to read it again and again and again; but it sank in and I got it.  A most horrific event had occurred and the innocents of the world had paid the ultimate price for the anger and mental state of another.  They were dead. I was numb. The conversation in my shop was continuing. I was the only one who had read the headline and I couldn’t bring myself to repeat it.  Not at that moment, not until everyone left and it was just I and my friend across the room.  It was then that I said the words, whatever words they were, that told her of the tragic events unfolding in Newton, Connecticut.

Moments later a Facebook post from one of my students; this was only 15 minutes from where she lives.  Then another post, and another, and another; they continued to one after the other.  Disbelief, grief, sadness, shock; there are no words to describe how everyone felt, how we feel.  Words of comfort and consolation sent out from one person to the next. Virtual hugs and messages of mourning and love were little to console the madness of the day.  I lit a candle.

emma

It seems such a small gesture but for me it was the only thing I could do at the moment.  A candle lit so that the ancestors could lead the nation’s babies to their place among them.  This way they would not be struggling in the dark trying to find their way alone.  The light would help them; it would help me. I always tell everyone to take care of yourself first then you are able to take care of others.  This I needed to do for me.

I am a wife, a mother, a grandmother, a daughter, a sister, a friend and many more things than these few definitions.  I am flesh and blood and the sea of emotion inside me is deep.  It is the same with everyone I know.  There are times when the care givers need to take care as well, and so the candle was lit.  It was a single act and now I move forward to try to make sense of an event that is beyond the darkest recesses of the mind.  Now I take on that other role, the one that I wrap the title Chaplain around.  It is time for the Priestess to come forward and to help walk the bright souls through the veil as they need to and to hold the individuals left behind in universal arms to console their grief.

It makes no difference if you knew the victims of yesterday’s tragedy the grief and loss of so many is overwhelming.  It is the grief for lost innocence, for babies who will no longer be able to look at the world in wonder, wondering when senseless violence will end, for the lost respect for life and for so much more.  We as the human race lost so much yesterday I believe it is time to rethink what we value and what we want to leave our children as a legacy to be proud of.

These are my grandbabies: Emma, Logan and Isla.  They are beautiful and full of life. I cannot imagine loganwhat life would be like without them around and I grieve for what the parents of the children in Newtown are going through.  But I make a promise to my three grandbabies to make this world better.  I promise to work so that no other parents or children have to endure this type of pain and that when they are old and have grandbabies of their own they can be proud of the changes that came about because a few people decided that the world needed to be safe.

islaDo I know what that means? No, but I do know that if we do not begin to value life more than a trip to the mall on Black Friday then as a caring people we are doomed.  If we do not care enough for our children to disengage from a culture which glorifies violence more babies will die.  If we decide to not change then we decide that money and guns are our gods and that life in all its forms means nothing. Only the powerful and the feared will walk this land but never feeling quite safe.

I challenge all of you to make the same promise to someone you love.  Maybe, just maybe, if we all make such a promise the world can become a better place.

wolf

12/12/12 – A day when balance is supposed to come forward, when light workers and healers are supposed to feel the increase in energies and raise to a higher vibration and so many other things that we have “discovered” will happen are to become manifest.

But I wonder… nature has no calendar other than the seasons as they turn. It does not put numbers on days, months or years so what makes this day any different from any other? The mother herself that gave birth to all from the great primordial sea placed no specific or special date on this one sun rising. Will the wolf, crow, raven, snake, whale, elk, lion, dragonfly or any other creature be lost in this shift that man has defined? I believe not. So why, as just another species in nature, does the human race create such an energy swirl around one random sunrise? Why not see everyday as a time to find balance, for raising our energies and achieving heightened awareness and deciding that we wish to be agents for peace, love and change.

I challenge you all to make those your goals as you contemplate the significance of today’s sunrise and take what you find beyond tonight’s sundown.

Once again Hendricks Chapel is taking students to London to explore the dynamics of interfaith understanding and cooperation. It is an amazing opportunity for the students who will be forming the future policies on social issues that are intertwined with religious acceptance. We have students that are working hard to earn the funds to be able to go on this trip and I’m asking that you help them in any way that you can. First, we have put together an online Avon fund-raiser. As my husband said “this isn’t your grandma’s Avon.” Lots of things from stocking stuffers, makeup, and fragrances to clothes, cookware and jewelry.

This particular event will last for about two weeks, ending on December 14th and in plenty of time for anything purchased for the holidays to arrive at your door. You can access the online event at http://www.youravon.com/mkhudson, then use the special promotion code “SPIRAL” during checkout. When you do this 20% of all sales will go toward the students on this trip.

If you prefer to just donate directly you can do so through PayPal. Just log into PayPal and hit the “send money” button. Use the email address COTGCampusPagans@gmail.com as the email to send funds to. This will put the funds directly into the account setup for the student’s fundraising. Remember to forward this on to all of those you know regardless of whether or not you think they will be interested. You might be surprised!

Both the students and I thank you deeply for your contributions both the trip but also for the interfaith understanding that such an event creates.

Yesterday was unusual; I was up and on the road before 6 am. That is unheard of! But for good reason, I needed to be on campus early in order to attend the Common Ground for Peace Conference’s morning panel discussion entitled “The Rise of Democracy in the Middle East.” The panel had as its central speaker His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama. For me this conference was a joy to attend and an amazing opportunity to learn from some of the greatest minds available.

The discussion was profound, the messages deep and I learned. I learned that the former head of the CIA, James Woolsey, is adamant that as a world we need to eliminate our need for oil. Not just foreign oil by the USA; but our dependence on ALL oil as a world. We must stop using it altogether. It was also enlightening to know that he reads bumper stickers – especially ones that state “if you want peace fight for justice.” I have a new-found respect for Mr. Woolsey; he truly is an advocate for peace and the human race as a whole. Then there was Shirin Ebadi, an Iranian lawyer and human rights activist. Democracy and social justice were the battle cries that she carried quietly with her. She was correct when she stated that the true measure of democracy and social justice with in a society can be seen in how it treats its women. In my opinion we are failing in this respect, some countries and states worse than others but on a whole we are failing. I took pause when Irshad Manji spoke of everyone’s basic right to question the world around them. I had always considered free thought a right, but for some reason today it became highlighted even more. Not only should we be able to think freely but also question freely without fear of condemnation or imprisonment. All of the speakers were amazing, but it truly was his Holiness that I came to see.

He was the last one to be introduced and as the Dali Lama entered the room I could feel a wave of energy spread throughout the crowd. What he brought with him was the feeling of peace; the feeling of pure spirituality. When he spoke his meaning was clear: children have figured it out; they find the common amongst each other. They find what is common and good and that is what they hold on to when they play. Children get along because it is the right and fun thing to do; they find the oneness of humanity that as adults we so often lose. As he continued to speak it was the lesson of inner peace despite what else is happening. To create peace in this world we need to find it within ourselves first. He talked directly to the students in the audience because they are the next generation, the generation of this century as he put it. They are the ones to create peace in this century. Do I believe they will? I think they can if they remember to do so. As he stated to us all, it starts first with the individual finding peace within themselves and then carrying that peace to those around them. As a reminder he reiterated peace is not the absence of violence but something else, an acceptance of peace within and then finding that peace in others. In that way we can place value on the individual, more emphasis as a society on peace than on war, and more value on each other as humans rather than on possessions or monetary gain.

In the end his message was simple: find the oneness of humanity, find the peace within.

Community is an amazing thing. It is a word that means something different to many people and over the next few days/weeks I fully intend to discuss as much as I can about it. But to begin with why I find community amazing, I must go back to the beginning of summer and the conference at Yale that I had such high hopes for and was sorely disappointed in. What has transpired since then has been nothing less than amazing.

I have been included in many discussions, panels, interfaith initiatives and much that physically prove that things are changing. But a more important thing is occurring on a much smaller scale. It is the interaction between individuals that say “I see you and I find value in you.” What a wonderful place the world would be if we all could look at a stranger (or a relative for that matter) and realize that one thing – we all have value.

I find that this is the single most important thing that each person I run into values. They have been recognized and appreciated by another for who they are. At the same time as I was dealing with the conference I was having conversation with my daughter who now lives in Southern Alabama. It was a great move for her and her little family. Work opportunities were better there as well as her husband’s family. Needless to say her health benefited from a warmer climate as well. Unfortunately Southern Alabama is not the easiest place to find other Pagans.

As we talked about being alone it hadn’t dawned on me, nor had it her prior to her move, that there are places in this country where crickets are louder than the local Pagan community and, therefore, almost impossible to find. She told me that she had always practiced solitary as an adult, and she has, but there was always a shop, family, friends, drum circles and festivals to be found where “community” could be found. In her new home there is virtually nothing. No Pagan Pride Day in the state, only two shops that she can find in all of Alabama that she “thinks” are Pagan and a silence that says don’t tell anyone your religious views. New challenges with new surroundings shouldn’t have to include feeling that you have to hide a part of yourself.

So, where does this bring me in my rambling? Last night’s debates contained a statement by Mitt Romney that went as follows:

“…I believe we must maintain our commitment to religious tolerance and freedom in this country… We’re a nation that believes that we’re all children of the same god…”

Unfortunately these two statements rip at the fabric of community and the diversity that it represents. I do not believe in this statement. No, I do not believe that we are “all children of the same god” nor do I believe that there is any religious tolerance in the statements made by Mr. Romney. His statements contradict themselves, you cannot have tolerance and state that we all believe the same thing; it doesn’t work that way. Sadly my daughter is living in a place she loves but must practice her faith in secret because to do otherwise would subject her entire family religious discrimination.

Community is a beautiful thing, treasure it wherever it is and however it is, but when you do so understand that not everyone experiences it the same. Do your words hurt or harm and more important if you are Pagan and very much out of the closet don’t judge those that haven’t taken that step yet. Support them in their decision on who to tell or not because you don’t know what it is they experience when they are alone.

It has been a rough week, an enlightening week.  I thank everyone that has listened because this was not an easy journey that I walked but I did it knowing that all of you are here.  I know that what I do is worth it because we are worth it and parts of the world need to know that there are others who have voices that will never be silenced.  Every last one of you inspires me to move forward, you are why I do what I do.

So, what next; in all fairness what comes next is sharing the perspectives that I received from this experience and what the few positives were.  So here goes:

  1. Janice Jones – my roommate from Wales.  She allowed me a voice when I felt I had none.  She listened, was compassionate and understood my frustrations.  She is from Prifysgol Glyndwr University, Wrexham.  Send her a note if you think of it and acknowledge the kindness she showed me.
  2. There is something I need to do, or at least needs to be done, with the young women of Salem College in Winston-Salem, NC.  I’m not sure what it is, but I am sure that it will manifest itself eventually.
  3. The Air Force – believe it or not even though their language was embedded in Christianity they were the most open-minded group that I encountered.  I can’t fault them for the language, it is all they know and they are willing to be educated.  I spoke with them the first evening and expressed a desire to talk to them about their stone circle.  The end result was an agreement to an ongoing discussion after the conference and a possible trip to the Academy to visit the circle and see what they have done.  In all honesty, the military was not what I expected to be the highlight and they turned out to be. Oh and I am getting a copy of their Religious Respect curriculum in order to understand what they teach their cadets.
  4. What to do in the future – this is the question that faces me now and this is what I think…

I just ran the gauntlet; I hadn’t intended to, but I did.  The wounds to my mind are fresh and the bruises on my soul have barely started turning color but my  soul and the beliefs I hold in my heart are intact.  It’s time to breathe deep and move forward and forward will take me to many places; I just have to start by taking one step.  I’ve done that by looking for positive from this experience.  With that, I think that a symposium centered on minority religions, religious tolerance, and listening to the marginalized on how best to respect them is in my future.  Leaving the dogma behind it is time we remember that we were all born with two ears and one mouth. People in the majority need to quit telling others how to be “integrated” and start listening to what people in the minority are saying.  They would be amazed at what they hear.

I found the following on YouTube today.  Let’s just say it’s how I feel, it speaks to what is in my heart and hopefully it will help you understand what keeps me moving forward. Thank you Bill, Kate, Kurt and everyone else; this is for you.

http://youtu.be/13dsYEOi5TY

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